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That Rascally Orly Taitz

September 16, 2009
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Trust me, folks: she's not as sane as she looks. I would like to believe that Dick Cheney is a syphilitic pedophile whose primary recreational activity is torturing puppies. However, since beliefs are one’s internal representations of the way the world actually is, I am forced to abandon those conjectures, settling instead for the belief that Cheney is a miserable cunt whose ethics fall just short of Nixon’s, Blagojevich’s or Madoff’s.

That, I am afraid, is the price of admission for being a human. Much as we would like the world to take its cues from our imaginations, that’s just not how it works. A well-functioning mind must be a slave to reality.
All of which brings me to our old friend Orly Taitz. She is the dreadful woman who has become the heavily-painted face of the “Birthers”. You know, those dicks who insist that Barack Obama is a Kenyan Muslim, hellbent on subverting the Constitution by usurping the presidency.

Never one to let reality get in the way of her zealotry, Taitz has been clogging our federal courts like that slimy hair that you never want to pick out of the shower drain.  No matter that Obama’s birth certificate has been available for over a year, and the local Hawaiian newspapers have provided their contemporaneous announcements of his birth.  Never mind that the State of Hawai’i’s health department has authenticated his birth certificate on two separate occasions.

At this point, she’s pot committed, and like a shitty poker player on tilt, she’s all in. Fortunately for those of us living in reality, no one who has given the issue more than a moment’s clear thought gives any credence at all to Taitz or her ilk, and today proved to be a pretty big upset for that crazy piece of shit.

In a 14-page opinion, Bush-appointed federal district judge Clay Land tossed Taitz’s nonsense out of court.  It’s about as stern an opinion as a judge can issue, and it’s right on the money.  It notes that neither Congress nor any of Obama’s primary or general election opponents found any evidence that he’s not American by birth. It deemed the action “frivolous” and threatened to sanction her should she bring similar suits before him in the future.

A Fella Can DreamWill any of this logic stop Taitz’s raving?  Absolutely not.  Rather, she has compared her “oppression” to Nelson Mandela’s, and has insisted that Judge Land deserves to be tried for treason.  She’s a fucking lunatic, doing what lunatics do best.  In effect, she has given herself permission to insist that Cheney is a syphilitic pedophile; her work, as Hamlet would say, consists of “words, words, words.”  So let’s be glad that we live in a nation whose Constitution allows this sewage to flow unfettered, and equally glad that (with the exception of 33% of New Jersey’s Republicans) the marketplace of ideas won’t buy what she’s selling.

In awed recognition of her inability to take her lumps and shut the fuck up, and especially for her tenacious trumpeting of a fake cause,  Is It Luck will proudly confer upon Ms. Taitz four snarling chihuahuas, pending her production of a valid certification that she was born on planet Earth.

Congratulations, Orly!  Yip yip yip!  If you are indeed an earthling, there may be more chihuahuas in your future!

Update: As of 1:19 A.M., this blog post is the seventh hit returned by a Google search Orly Taitz chihuahua cheney is it luck. Seventh! The internet is nothing if not full of words.

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. Paul permalink
    September 17, 2009 12:29 am

    The birthers, the tea baggers, the screamers, and the deathers continued extreme minority presence will become tiresome to mainstream America, if it has not already done so. To all the birthers in La, La Land, it is on you to prove to all of us that your assertion is true, if there are people who were there and support your position then show us the video (everyone has a price), either put up or frankly shut-up. I heard Orly Taitz, is selling a tape (I think it’s called “Money, Lies and Video tape”). She is from Orange County, CA, now I know what the mean when they say “behind the Orange Curtain”, when they talk about Orange County, the captial of Conspiracy Theories. You know Obama has a passport, he travel abroad before he was a Senator, but I guess they were in on it. In my opinion the Republican Party has been taken over the most extreme religious right (people who love to push their beliefs on others while trying to take away the rights of those they just hate) and that’s who they need to extract from their party if they real want to win. Good Luck, because as they said in WACO, “We Ain’t Coming Out”. I heard that she now wants to investigate the “Republican 2009 Summer of Love” list: Assemblyman, Michael D. Duvall (CA), Senator John Ensign (NV), Senator Paul Stanley (TN), Governor Mark Stanford (SC), Board of Ed Chair, and Kristin Maguire AKA Bridget Keeney (SC).

  2. Barry permalink*
    September 17, 2009 12:41 am

    Well put, Paul; thanks for the comment. I wonder how long the lunatic fringe can sustain the current level of outrage before it winds up alienating its potential allies. Any legitimate concerns over Obama’s young presidency stem from policy disagreements over bailouts and healthcare. It’s natural for those issues to spur some partisan disagreement, but the introduction of fascism, Hitler, and the birth issue only serve to undermine the genuine debates.

    • Mister Bojangles permalink
      September 17, 2009 12:04 pm

      We just don’t want German Health care c.a. 1939. It SUCKED.

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