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English is hard.

June 24, 2009
by

(cross-posted at Lingua Franca)

This is my favorite store in park slope (click on the picture to enlarge & read the green awning):

Yes, it’s Stop & Fifth, which is either at the corner of of Fifth Ave and Stop Street, or the proprietors think “fifth” is a verb. Maybe it’s some obscure, extremely thorough way of practicing Robert’s Rules of Order.

“I move that we adjourn!”
“I second.”
“I third.”
“I fourth.”
[…silence…]
“Anyone? C’mon, we need someone to fifth this motion before we can vote on it. What about you, Johnson? I fifthed your stupid ‘chips and salsa at all meetings’ motion last week.”

I guess Stop & Fifth is one of those rare establishments where you can pop in to fulfill any bizarrely draconian bureaucratic duties while you wait for your tuna wrap.

To be precise, Stop & Fifth is my favorite currently open Park Slope establishment. My all time favorite, which I sadly do not have a picture of, was a dollar store that enthusiastically boasted on its awning “99¢! And Less! And Up!”

In the just plain stupid category, there’s this, which Alexis snapped while I was driving through Mamaroneck last weekend:

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