Skip to content

Official Is It Luck 2008 Democratic Primary Endorsement

June 16, 2009

Sunday evening, I took the U.S. Air Shuttle from Laguardia to Reagan National Airport.  Being the big nerd I am, I love gazing out airport windows.  Those giant wingèd Tylenols scoot down the runway really fast.  Then they’re in the air!  It’s so cool.  Works every time.

So, there I am, drooling over the jets right before boarding when I sense a group of people whisking behind me to the jetway.  When I turned around, I saw a couple of security guard looking fellas disappearing into the doorway.  The last one handed the ticket taker a stack of tickets.

Boarding starts, and I head down the jetway.  Outside the door of the plane is one of the security guards; he’s watching all the passengers board and typing into his Blackberry.  So who could all this fuss be about?

Sitting in first class, smacking a Blackberry of her own, is none other than Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.  She has big sunglasses and a ghastly dye job.  Her hair looks like a badger and a rat are making a baby right above her face .  I am glad about this.  She’s far too busy running the Department of State to worry about whether her head looks like it’s home to a badger copulating with a rat.

It was a short flight, and she certainly was not giving any speeches, which is too bad.  She’s a good speaker.  For  this reason -that is to say, for no reason- Is It Luck is proud to endorse Dennis Kucinich and his intelligent, sexy, 6-foot tall, redheaded, piercèd-tongued English wife for Democratic co-nominees for the presidency of the United States of America.  Sure, Elizabeth can’t be president under the Constitution, but what’s a little constitutionality between friends?  What does that even mean?  This blog post should end here have ended several sentences ago.

God Damn, Dennis!  You Win.  Click here for a photograph of a Tylenol Sandwich!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: